In the last year or so conversations have come up regarding bullying and unkindness happening – more often than before – in our small community. My post on perfectionism touched on how striving for the (elusive) perfect costume project can blind us in applying our own rules of historical accuracy to everyone else’s creative work.
Unfortunately, intimidation and bullying occur in all industries – including our beloved historical costuming circle.
I strive to create a “Joyful Community” here. I constantly monitor my “Historical Sewing” social media accounts to keep conversations kind, respectful and meaningful. I’m not afraid to hide, delete and ban comments and commenters that bring too much heaviness and negativity to the posts.
You might be thinking now, what does this have to do with this “Butt Ugly Brigade?”
See, I made a post on the Facebook page of my recently finished 1884 Steelers Royalty bustle dress that many followers had been waiting to see.
The dress was made for our Costume College 2018 group: the Dress of Wrong. The project description means you create a historical ensemble with accurate silhouette and undergarments but use obviously wrong fabric. (Think a Regency dress out of Snoopy fabric.)
With the main theme of the event being “Dressing the Royals” I came up with merging our family’s favorite sports team – the only NFL team to win six Superbowls – with my favorite historical fashion era.
It was truly a Dress of Wrong; however, I purposely only used the Steeler logo print fabric in the overskirt so I could repurpose the underskirt and bodice later (‘cause, why not get more mileage out it, right??).
So on the Facebook post a random stranger said: “What is that print thing hanging from the dress? It looks like old, used pajamas! The yellow and black is pretty, but ditch that print thing! It is butt ugly!”
Seriously.
-Sigh- Oh, those anonymous comments made behind a screen!
After a few years of dealing with *thousands* of followers on social media, I’ve learned to be a duck…. And let words roll off my back like water off a duck.
Some of my friends took a stand for me and replied back to the original commenter. (Grace and peace to her.)
I knew I didn’t make my (very fun and well-received) Dress of Wrong ensemble for this particular person.
I made it for me. To have fun being creative with a historical mash-up dress.
The story now goes: I took a screenshot of the comment and shared to my personal FB page. “Ha! I made something “butt ugly.” [See… let it roll off your back and don’t be so bothered by negativity you see online.]
Through a fun and interesting thread of conversation there, my friend, Jeanette, suggested “we do a Butt Ugly theme next year [for Costume College].”
Side Note: the 2019 theme for Costume College is “What’s that Fabric?”
And this is how you make lemonade with the lemons that are thrown your way…. You start a new group and call it the BUB – The Butt Ugly Brigade.
“What’s that fabric?”
“I don’t know, but it’s butt ugly!”
THIS is how you fight the bullying in our costuming community – with JOY and CREATIVITY and finding the LIGHT.
Our little group grew to over 100 members in a day! (yowzers)
And I’ve been truly amazed at what has come from a single “butt ugly” comment about my own costume. We’ve bonded together to stand for all types of creative work and the freedom to “be you” in your costuming.
We are taking those ugly, awful, hideous fabrics buried in the stash, hanging at the thrift store, or on the clearance rack at the fabric shop and turning them into artistic projects – pom-pom fringe and Bedazzled alike.
Honestly, this group has *exploded* so quickly, and we now have mini-groups doing funky vintage aprons and others making royal orders devoted to Liberace.
Ha! Yes, we are bringing it ALL!
As a group we want to:
- Show the world we support others within our small industry.
- To encourage each other…. even when we have on the most disgusting costume and not the fabulous Worth reproduction.
- To recognize the work that went into a particular project.
- To raise each other up as members of the worldwide costuming community.
- To grow together as we journey this creative road. No matter where we are at on that road or the current goals we are working towards as individuals.
Even if you aren’t attending Costume College in 2019, you can join our Butt Ugly Brigade (BUB) commitment by spurring others on in their costuming. To offer support and guidance to someone even if their creative work doesn’t appeal to your own sensibilities. <—– REALLY IMPORTANT
That one who is researching weaves of historical textiles to replicate them and the one hot gluing trim to the hem and everyone in between – we are all in this together.
Combat those awful, random stranger comments by keep moving forward. And keep sharing your creativity with the world – butt ugly or not.
I think its sad how people will say whatever they think while posting online that they would never say to someone in person. The people saying nasty, thoughtless things may not realize how they are coming across, but people should remember the old adage, “if you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all”.
By the way, I love the black and gold part of your dress. It’s lovely.
I think we’re all guilty of thinking (and maybe even posting) unkind things while sitting behind our screens. But you’re right in keeping it to ourselves and not actually “saying it out loud” in a comment.
P.S. I’m currently making a new black & gold overskirt to wear this dress again in September for a Victorian event.
Well stated Jennifer! We are all different levels of learning and practicing. BUB sound wonderful. And your Steeler’s dress is awesome!
As someone who has an interest in historical fashion and was raised in the Pittsburgh area, I love your Steelers dress! It is so creative and well done. And I can’t fathom how someone could look at the “print fabric” and not know who the Steelers are or understand how that fabric ties in to the greater theme of the dress. Either way, I’m in complete agreement with you. We all must create for ourselves. There are always going to be differences in taste, but it would be nice if people would keep unnecessary critical comments to themselves. And learn who the Steelers are… This would be an amazing dress to wear to a superbowl party next time they go!
I’ve seen some amazing dresses made from fabrics I would never choose to work with myself. I especially love when someone can pair two fabrics I would never think of pairing together into a whole that works. It is an art!
I’m still getting my nerve up to share this dress on the Steelers social media pages. 😉
When I first got started in historical costuming I made several outfits that were “butt ugly”. My first were peasant outfits using a pattern for an Elizabethan corset for the bodice and very modern fabric for the skirts. My friend and I went to Southern Faire in these outfits and my day was ruined by the people (yes there were several who did this) chastising me for being out in my underwear. I never forgot this and as my knowledge and skills improved and I started to garner some small amount of attention I made it my practice to always find something to compliment another costumer about. I only offered a critique if asked and tried to couch it in the most positive terms I could. If some one has tried the effort must be valued. And the person must never be wounded by a comment. “Butt Ugly” indeed. Jennifer I have seen your work for many years and think you make the most gorgeous costumes. Alas, I am no longer costuming but I would love to join the BUB, if you’ll have me.
Thanks, Caren. 🙂
Jennifer, hurray for you! I saw and had the chance to congratulate you on your tongue in cheek, butt ugly dress at CC. It honestly was one of the standouts for me at College. The creativity and joy I get from sewing is why I do it. While I appreciate the time and skill it takes to reproduce a garment from a painting or antique photography, such garments bore me. Sign me up for the “ Butt ugly group” can’t wait to see what everyone comes up with at CC 2019!
Thank goodness for ignorant , snarky, cowardly people who let us know which path NOT to take!
i applaud you reacting with a positive approach to a negative comment.
it isn’t just “get rid of the nasty person”, but let’s make the world, and people like that, more beautiful.
you know they say ugly things because ugliness fills their hearts. change the inside and find a new outside.
I loved your “Butt Ugly” story and your gracious comments regarding the posting stranger.
Definitely grace to her; it was the comment (not her personally) that was unkind and I’m not sure it was from not knowing about this particular “wrong” costume, no knowledge of bustle dresses, or not a Steelers/football fan. But I’m happy to see the direction the comment has taken a large group of people.
Jennifer, I saw your dress at CoCo and it totally rocked, right up to the SuperBowl rings decorating the dress. Someone had her head up her butt-ugly when she made that comment!
I LOVE your Dress of Wrong! I attended a Day of Wrong at the Kansas City Faire one year. On the day my beloved Broncos were playing the Chiefs IN Kansas City. So, I made a special Bronco’s Chemise just for the event! I had so much fun wearing it, and that’s all that really mattered. And I tucked a transister radio (okay, so it was a few years ago) and ear phones into my bodice so I could listen to the game. (Bronco’s won!)
I remember the sushi dress and a few others over the years! All in good fun. There was even a money dress used when collecting payment for raffle tickets. I’m not sure if I’ll be there 2019 (one problem with moving out of state) but I’ll certainly cheer on anyone who sews a dress that makes them happy…no matter how non HA it is!
I’ve only recently started to received your newsletters (actually this blog post was the very first one that I received), but I noticed the post on instagram of this “butt ugly” dress you made. I didn’t actually realize you were the same person as the blog I had just signed up for (I started to follow a bunch of different historical sewing accounts at the same time). Any ways, all these details are to let you know that when I saw this dress, and then followed the #dressofwrong hashtag to see all the other dresses, I was just blown away by yours (and all the other creators) dresses. I love the idea of historical clothing in different prints and I really think that the idea is amazing and awesome!
Thanks, Samantha. And Welcome to our Joyful Community! 🙂
I love this idea. Life is too short to deal with all the naysayers. While I am not a Steelers fan, I love your dress. You did a great job on it. I like the idea of BUB. There are some fabrics out there that are wonderfully period that I think are just plain ugly, but I wouldn’t get nasty about it. A friend has one like that. She admits it’s ugly, but so period she had to make it. To each their own.
I look forward to seeing what everyone comes up with.
I look at my sewing as being my art. It’s scary to make yourself vulnerable, sewing exactly what you want, and putting your art out for everyone to see by wearing it! It’s one thing to paint and display your paintings for people to admire. It’s something else, and quite intimidating, to make something and wear it around! You can’t shy away from it when it’s wrapped around your body! Clothing is especially personal. I hate to see people saying negative things about someone else’s art because it was very courageous of them to put it out in the first place, not to mention all the work they put behind creating it. The more unique the art is, whether I personally like it or not, is awesome because it expands my mind of what the possibilities are. It also gives me inspiration to do the same, in my own way.
So sorry you had to receive that negative comment! Negativity is such a waste of time and energy. It surely does nothing to make the world a better place. Kindness, on the other hand costs nothing.
I love your posts that I see regularly on FB and appreciate the time you take to share those things. It is true that we don’t all have the same tastes, but that doesn’t mean something is no good.
In this kind of sewing work, we gave many difficult decisions to make in deciding how authentic we want to make something. There is the cost if authentic materials and also our own skill level and the time we have to invest. That person with the ugly attitude probably doesn’t even sew… but in any case, I hope they just go away and leave good people alone.
I hope you are encouraged to know how many people love what you are doing. I have never met you personally, but your sweet attitude shines through the posts. 😊💖
Thank you so much Renee. <3
Wow…there’s no reason for someone to leave a comment like that…constructive criticism is one thing….saying something with the intent to be hurtful is totally another. People like that just need to be blocked.
I can’t say I love it (sadly, I a Brown’s fan. ‘nuf said LOL), but you did an amazing job making a gown that CAN be repurposed after the fun event at the Costume College. Very clever.
I have a collection of the vintage repro patterns that the Big 3 pattern companies have been releasing over the past several years. I really was wanting to make one several years ago, and I just didn’t have inspiration for the fabric…
Until I went to Hancock with a friend. We were walking through the holiday-themed quilting fabrics, and I saw fabric that was row upon row of harvest corn kernels. I grabbed it, looked at my friend, and exclaimed, “THIS! This is my dress fabric!”
I bought it. Later she took her mom to the store and my fabric came up. The mom responded, “That’s not what that fabric is for. It’s for napkins or quilts.” My friend told her, “But Cahira sees it as a 1950s dress.”
When the mom saw me in the dress, she had to admit that it worked…despite it not being AT ALL what she would have made or worn. So, I’m all for using the crazy fabrics that other people declare are “wrong.” 😀
Yay! Sounds more like a “Dress of Wrong” to me, but it’s all fun to be creative with fabric!
Let’s not forget that the Victorians THEMSELVES actually had entire gossip rags and sessions dedicated to [bashing] the clothes of others. It is in fact a long-term costuming goal of mine to make an entire series, not of “Dress of Wrong,” but of over the top period-rules hideous clothes in various silhouettes, and represent the “mushrooms” of history. I want to break ALL the sumptuary laws in one outfit, load up on the flounces, use the most terrible but expensive fabrics, and be that “mutton dressed as lamb.” Because it’s FUN.
And at the same time, I will only give advice if asked. If you don’t have time to hand-sew that trim, I’m at WORST going to say, “Go a little easier next time, and once it’s cool, remember to snip your glue strings.”
We often make the mistake of thinking all historical dress was beautiful, but questionable taste in ones wardrobe is not new. Example: Queen Victoria wearing a dress covered all over in little knobby buttons. Pannier hoops being worn under high waisted regency gowns. The popular colour ‘goose turd green’. Its rather fun to search out the ‘interesting’ fashions. Unkindness, however, is never excusable. I wonder what the ‘ancient Egyptian for ‘oh my Gods, what is she wearing’ sounded like
I worked in a fabric store for almost fifteen years. There were some fabrics that I considered hideous. (The red/black/white stripe knit comes to mind.) But always there is someone that fabric will call to and be the most beautiful, most perfect fabric ever. I described your Steelers dress to several people and they thought it clever and cute.
Aw, thanks! And yes to our varied fabric interests! I mean, *someone* had the design ability to create those fabrics that some others of us find ugly. It’s so fun seeing projects come together with interesting/ugly materials.
I have been having so much fun brain storming and collaborating with others for this! I haven’t been excited about an event this much in a very long time!
Thank you for bringing this up, running with it, and showing that it doesn’t have to be perfect as long as it’s creative, fun, and we are learning. We all start somewhere, and I love the support and new friendships I’ve gained from this group!❤️
This is SO AWESOME!
Ages ago, we used to call it ‘twisted historicals,’ & one of the first classes I taught at CoCo was all about that! I made several such outfits including a sushi-themed bustle gown (down to a sushi corset, not seen) – HERE – & a gothic vampire themed Victorian bathers outfit – HERE – which I did wear at the beach w/a bunch of goths too 🙂
One year, at the CoCo tea, in the AirTel days, a friend totally slayed with a John Deer print Victorian gown. I seem to recall she incorporated a tiny toy tractor in her hat. Some ppl didn’t get it, but I loved the heck out of that!
Your sushi dress is awesome! I remember when “twisted historicals” was new in conversation. Recently, Jonatha shared her John Deere bustle in our Dress of Wrong group, and we love it! Then I met Laura (in 2009) who made an Elizabethan out of her old army fatigues complete with army men figures on her cap. I think those ideas have spurred a new generation to “branch out” of only doing true historical ensembles and to play with creativity. I’m having a blast with it as are many others! Thanks for sharing yours. 🙂
Oh yes! I remember the camo Elizabethan too, so good! Historical costuming gets a reputation for being Very Serious, & I’m always thrilled when ppl take a sideways look at it. We’re all just silly ppl dressing up in funny clothes after all 😉
Although I haven’t attempted any historical costumes yet , I love to quilt. I always include a few “butt ugly” fabrics in my quilts-they give quilts movement and life, keep the quilt from being too bland and make the other fabrics “pop “.
Our local Living History Re-enactment group encompassed the Fur Trade period of 1640-1840… pretty wide scope for fashion, huh?? Still, some people couldn’t quite get it ‘right’… if they were beginners we tried to steer them toward ‘In The Spirit Of’ clothing and fabrics with the hope that as they increased their participation they would start to see that their ITSO garb didn’t fit in with the rest of the participants. Some ‘got it’ sooner than others, but – hey – at least they were participating, RIGHT??
So, Butt Ugly doesn’t always happen on purpose – I totally appreciated your post on your Steelers project – I even read the article so I knew what it was about… guess your snarky commentator should have taken a moment to read it B4 making her remarks?? Her comments def come under ‘Butt Ugly’ too!!
Sew on, and sew on Ladies!!
I will make clear for everyone that a “butt ugly” costume for our particular group is not to represent historical fashion. Many in our group are not even using a historical silhouette. For living history it really is a matter of trying to work up to the appropriateness of the era. Some turn out “ugly” because it truly is what was done then and as modern people we are jarred by it. Others need that gentle leading to better costume ensembles.
And honestly, “butt ugly” is in the eye of the beholder, right? I’m using the fabric at the top of this post for my BUB costume, but the lady at the fabric store actually liked the print. So, we’re all individuals here. The point is we support each other in promoting our own form of creativity. 🙂 And yes – “sew on!”
You hit the nail on the head there. I started laughing shortly into your post, because I cannot count the number of times that I, with my 20th and now 21st century eyes have looked at period fashions and thought, “Whoa! What were they thinking? How horrid!” or something like that.
LOL Yet, someone actually liked that style we find horrid. All those things we are personally attracted to, others find repulsive. It’s why I’ve changed over the years to promote creativity in general. And also stay far away from that ugly stuff. 😉